Physics and a Cat
Only Einstein can tolerate a pal like my new cat. So I’ve sent her off in a crate to live with the old man, white hair stiff like exclamation points a-top his wise head.
Too involved with his radical ideas he’ll never notice that she really doesn’t give a fig for him. His very thoughts about the nature of physical reality will keep him engaged so he’ll never mind
that she ignores his lap, chooses to sleep in a window sill instead of beside him on the soft blue cat cushion that cost eighteen gazillion dollars. Yes, eighteen gazillion.
And when she laps up the fresh water he changes each morning and walks away with no apparent thanks, tail high in the air, hind end swaying from side to side, body language for Farewell, Pet Owner, Sucker, he’ll go ahead
and purchase a new computer so he can put her health-care at his fingertips on The Pet Portal Vet. Then he’ll clean up her hairballs and cat vomit and call her his best friend.